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  1. I once read about this guy who got arrested because he was a “serial cookie crusher”. For real. He would go into stores and smoosh bags of cookies and muffins and bread. He got some jail sentence, for malicious shoplifting or something.

  2. When Life gives you crumbs, make a crumbcake.

    Would someone who went from store to store squeezing boxes of Shredded Wheat be a serial cereal crusher?

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